Holier than I

I just read a chapter in Brian McLaren’s book, Naked Spirituality, in which he implied that appearing “holier than thou,” was not the worst problem of hypocrisy.  The real problem is appearing “holier than I.”  In other words, when we make ourselves out to be more spiritual than we actually are we are walking down a shadowy path that will do damage to our psyche, and harm to others as well.  Of course, we do this all the time, and not just in the religious realm.

When we look down our noses on someone else’s sense of style (“so tacky”), or lack of intelligence (“so stupid”), or political opinion (“idiots!”), we are elevating ourselves above them.  And very likely, we are making ourselves “holier” – more stylish, smarter, or more astute – than we actually are.  The roots of bullying are in this pretension.  Hypocrisy may have nothing to do with religion.  It is rooted, however, in the limitations of our humanity and our insecurities about who we are, which is certainly a problem with spiritual dimensions.

I am guilty, however, in the religious realm.  How many times I have made a judgment about someone else’s faith, “How can they believe that stuff?”  As if my own beliefs are somehow the standard of purity and orthodoxy.  Seems like we could all stand not just a dose but a steady diet of humility.

The Benedictine Rule has at its very heart, the spiritual discipline of humility.  Humility is not attained by effort, but by self-denial.  Such a practice is counter-cultural in a subversive way, without calling attention to itself, like yeast that leavens the whole loaf by disappearing into the dough. I am reminded of the joke, “It’s hard to be humble when you’re as great as I am.”  We’re living in a time, a culture, of celebrity - American Idols, bully politicians, and look-at-me-ism.  I suspect all of it is an overcompensation for our insecurities and anxieties.  And hypocrisy and pretense runs amok.

As I write this blog I am wondering about my own pretense, as if I have something important enough to say that the whole world (or my loyal half-dozen readers) should read.  I pray God may forgive my own hypocrisy.  Forgive my tendency to appear more holy than I really am.  And may I have the perseverance to continue walking in the path of humility until I am made what God would have me to be.